GOT A LOT OF NERVE....LITERALLY!

In the beginning I had planned for this blog to be about  chronic pain.  I had intended to talk about what I had gone through for the last 14 years & how it had changed recently to include several neuropathic  symptoms. At that time my health and the pain I was going through seemed to be the only thing I ever focused on.  I needed a place to speak about those feelings because the people who knew me  had grown tired of hearing about it.  I don’t blame others for feeling that way.  I was tired of it too.  I still needed a way to let it all out.  I didn’t feel comfortable enough to try to talk to someone anymore, I already knew the reaction I would get; i.e turned away and shut down.  I was feeling very much alone.   Then I started this blog and even though I didn’t post much about it, I spent a lot of time thinking about what I wanted to say.  

Then I had several test done.  When my doctor gave me the results, he told me something that made me question where I wanted go from there.  What he pretty much said was “I believe you.”  He also said that although it is rare, some test will show a false negative.  I have every reason to have nerve damage  with all the back surgery I have had.  He’s also positive that I have some form of  peripheral neuropathy.  I could have a nerve biopsy to prove it, but it can be quite painful and I could end up feeling worse.  

I left his office that day questioning if I wanted to keep doing this to myself.  I decided I didn’t.  Instead I have started focusing on doing whatever I can when I can.  I know that after having a few good days I will probably end up having a few bad, but it’s worth it.  I also decided to use my blog to talk more about  what obstacles  have faced in my life; i.e. domestic violence, an eating disorder, etc.., but I mainly want to share how my faith in God has helped me to overcome so much.

 I’m a different person now and I want to share it with the world.